Narasimhaye’s Blog

Mantra for Happiness

Posted on: April 20, 2011

Mantra
for Happiness        

Since
we were children we have been told what to do and what not to do:

We have
been told to be kind, generous and loving.
We
have been told that we should look at the positive things of life and not dwell
on the negative.We have been told to speak sweetly and not hurt anyone with our
words.We know that people throw a stone when they see a crow cawing, but want to
hear the koyal bird as long as possible even though they both look
similar.Like these we have been told many things by our elders and teachers and
books about the proper ways to tread the path of life.

But how many of
these values do we actually incorporate in our life?

We follow them
to a certain extent, but most of the times we follow our emotions and
instincts.If we become jealous, we want to harm others.
If
we become greedy we forget the moral values.If we are facing a bad time, we only
dwell on the negative and forget the positive.If we are angry, then we throw
everything to the wind and shout bad words.

But the winner is one who
knows how to remain strong and positive in the worst of circumstances. It is one
of the above values that we are taught since we came to this world, which I
realised with experience, is the mantra for Happiness. If followed fully
even in the worst of times, it gives rise to wonderful relationships, peace,
success and eventually happiness.

So what is this mantra for
happiness?

Do you know that there is one important thing that governs
our relationships with everyone around us?If that thing is used properly we have
a happy family, confident and loving children, trusted workers and colleagues.
It is that thing that governs how people around us look at us and thus forms our
image in society. It is on that thing that crores of deals between countries and
companies are made.

Now what is that important thing?

Is
it something we have control of or it is dependent on destiny or something not
in our control. Well that thing is a part of our body and we have the power of
full control on it. And that thing is our tongue.

Now I will tell
you by certain examples, how tongue governs all that has been said
before.

1. Suppose you have an argument with your close family
member and in that you say something that hurt the other person. After some time
or days, you resume a normal relationship, but what did was forgotten, but what
you said is never forgotten. It stays with the other person and surfaces every
time there is a bad patch between you. It modifies your impression on the other
person.

2. If you are angry with your child for keeping the room
untidy or not studying and you say something like “you will never succeed, you
are a failure”, the child loses his confidence. Then how many ever times later
you encourage the child to do well, at the back of his mind, he has someone
saying “you will never succeed, you are a failure”. Everytime you lose anger
with your child and tell him negative statements, they stick to his mind, and
later make him also behave the same way with others.

3. Suppose
there is some lady in your neighbourhood, whom you do not know much about and
except a hello, hi, you do not interact with her. Your impression about her
would be generally good. Probably she is a good lady doing social work and
helping others etc. Now one day you call her to ask for some help and she in
some mood speaks curtly…your impression of her immediately washes away. And next
time if someone asks you about her, you do not give a good report. One incident
was enough to give her a negative report.

4. Now take the case of
your domestic help or worker who has worked for you for a long time. Suppose she
comes late one day, and other day she takes leave without informing … your
anger surpasses all limits …how dare she … you had to do so much work … and as
soon as she steps in … you throw your volley of accusations … she gives you
some explanation … later you realise that you need her more than she needs you
… and you decide to keep quite … well the damage is done… She carries image
now, that you are someone not to be trusted .., you do not have value for the
years of hard work she put in for you … All your rewards and gifts and caring
for her has gone to the wind. Her loyalty to you is seriously affected.

There are several examples like this and I am sure you would all have
more examples than me to quote for these.

Essence: It is
so so important to control our tongue and not let it loose in
anycircumtance..because if we lose control of it, the harm it does is manifold
.. it destroys relationships, our childs confidence, our social status, loyalty
of our employees .. The incidents are forgotten, but words are never
forgotten.

So now, when it is so important to control our tongue,
how do we do it?

Sometimes we get so carried away by emotions that
the words just seem to slip out. What to do. Well for this I have discovered a
mantra and it is rightly called the mantra for happiness. It needs to be chanted
108 times daily throughout the day, silently in the mind…

and the
mantra is

“If I have to speak good, I will open my mouth , If I
have to speak bad, I will keep my mouth closed

Meaning

If I have to speak words of love,
encouragement, wisdom, understanding, I will open my mouth …

If I have
to speak out of anger, frustration, jealousy, irritation, I will keep
quiet.

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  • Narasimhaye: If you are able to talk to your or sister and your girl cousins, you will be able to speak to any girl you like. Don't be shy. Try to be confident in
  • arjun: sir please help me I cannot talk to any girl I'm not frank and I am very afraid of doing things I think what the world will think I don't have confide
  • Narasimhaye: I meant do Puja , not pika sorry.
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