Narasimhaye’s Blog

Tarpan Pitara Part Two

Posted on: November 13, 2008

Tarpan Pitara Part Two


My intention is to place our traditions and custosm with their general significances in front of the new-gen who want answers to questions about the whys and wherefores.

What they do with the knowledge is their karma. Most of our practices are shrouded in mystery and kept secret. When there is transparency, then the appeal is more.

Padmini Natarajan


Vaidyanathan Pushpagiri posted 2 mnths ago  

Mrs. Padmini:


“As rightly observed by you, while times change, the belief in those actions also change, but it is worth remembering the culture behind every great civilization. A noble thought indeed and that too coming from a lady “. A nice observation from Krishnan Bala.
In our 40 Samskaras it is enjoined that we discharge our three debts towards our forebears. Rishi, Deva and Pitr. Only after discharging these three debts can one think of attaining Moksha or Mukthi. When a dvijan completes his Brahmacharya Asrama, he has discharged his debt towards his Rishi. By doing the Yajnyas, as prescribed in the Vedas, one can discharge one’s debt towards the Devas. But one can discharge one’s debts towards one’s Pitr only by entering the Grihastashrama. That is why our forefathers have said “Dharma PrjarthamVruni Mahe.” Besides, when a girl enters the grihastasrama dharma, she also becomes a divijan – “Shtreenam Upanayana Sthane Vivaha“. Marriage confers the twice born status for ladies. They are released from their parental gotra after their marriage and they acquire their husband’s gotra resulting in changes of Asauca (period of grief). Her own father, mother,brother, sister etc. now become only blood relations and any death in her parental family affect her for only three days, against the 10,13 or 16 day period of grief in her husband’s family.

Why I am writing this in detail? Because Vivaha is the most important samskara in a man’s life. He enters the second Asrama, wherein he discharges his debts to Devas, Pitrs, Bhutas, Brahman and Manusha. Without a Sahadharmini it is imposible for a man to discharge his duties towards the other three Asramas as they depend on the Grihasta for their support and vitality.

Marriage to a girl gives her the status of a Sahadharmini. When King Janaka gives away Sita in marriage to Sri Rama, this is what he says in the famous sloka ‘Iyam Sita mama sudha sahadharmasaridhava: etc.etc. There are four more lines in the sloka but this is the operative line : “mama sudha saha dharma saridhava”.

Every Hindu believes in rebirth and the new birth depends on one’s past karma. Irrespective of whether it is a higher or lower form, one’s Jivatma is instrumental for one’s birth and being looked after in one’s early stages. So, as a mark of gratitude and repayment of the Pitr debt, Tarpanas are performed, with til and water. Sages have restricted this libation of water and til to the Pitrs of three generations on the paternal side, father, grand father and great grand father with their wives, and three generations on the maternal side, which includes mother’s father, his father, and grand father with their spouses. They are assigned the staus of Vasu /Rudra / Aditya Svarupas. One is supposed to do 96 Tarpanas in a year. (Shannavati). Actually the Tarpanas are the Gauna (shortened) form of the elaborate Sraddha Ceremonies and it is to be performed between 1.30 and 3.00 P.M. called Apara time. Since this karma has to be performed with faith it is called


Pushpagiri Chandrasekar Vaidyanathan Iyer.[VP]





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  • Narasimhaye: If you are able to talk to your or sister and your girl cousins, you will be able to speak to any girl you like. Don't be shy. Try to be confident in
  • arjun: sir please help me I cannot talk to any girl I'm not frank and I am very afraid of doing things I think what the world will think I don't have confide
  • Narasimhaye: I meant do Puja , not pika sorry.
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